Look After You
by jellyfishbowl
Summary: And Kaname had thought he knew everything about Zero. He was wrong. KxZ


_VKxHP. I am obssesed with poqo's safe from harm. I love the thought of magical zero. GAH! _

* * *

><p>"Zero…" The pureblood's voice was slow and easy. "I love you…"<p>

And that was the crux of it, wasn't it?

All that love.

Zero snarled furiously, angry at himself and wiping hastily at his eyes. No point in being weak about it, being such a fool. Falling in love, too.

Kaname's eyes, the frame of dark lashes against warm sienna. Too trusting. Too loving.

The tip of his wand against the sleeping pureblood's face, and then…

"_Obliviate…"_

.

.

.

"You're back, then?"

Zero looked up where he had been cleaning away at a Charnsuka stain on the old wood of the counter.

Charlie Weasley, grinning down at him like some lumbering redheaded oaf. All freckled tan and windy coppery hair.

"Orris root?" Zero answered by not answering at all. "Suppose you've come for more of it."

"Ah, yes, a pound of it, if you will. And how about some pennyroyal? I hear they calm down the dragons a lot better then shallots."

"You heard correctly." Zero agreed, moving to the many shelves, picking away at the many vials of potions ingredients. He couldn't remember how long he'd had this job, only that he had gotten quite good at it. "How much?"

"Just a few grams."

He nodded wordlessly, weighing the ingredients for the young Weasley, before eventually handing the ingredients to him.

"When'd you get back?"

"Two days ago." Said the silver haired boy, matter of factly, clearly avoiding the Weasley's gaze.

"How was the trip?" The redhead asked amiably.

Zero looked down, stilling. With a jerk he renewed his measuring. "Uh—fine. Portkey was a bit nauseating."

"I suppose that's to be expected, though." Charlie laughed heartily. "You been to the joke shop yet?"

"The emporium? No. I've heard quite a few… interesting rumors about it, though." Zero smiled briefly. The twins surely knew how to get that word of mouth going. Everyone in the alley was aware of their enormous shop at the top of the hill. Though perhaps that had more to do with the outrageous colors of the building and less to do with good praise.

"You should come 'round." Charlie smiled. "I'll give you the grand tour."

"As long as I don't get turned into a canary…" Zero hesitated skeptically.

Charlie laughed, opening the door. "I'll be sure to keep the goons away from you!"

Without any customers, the shop returned to the gloom that had etched into the very wood at Zero's return. He didn't mind running the shop for the old man, nor did he mind the room and board he got in return as well as the pay.

But a year away from home was a long time… and a lot of things could change in such a short while.

Cross Academy was much different then Hogwarts. For one, the separation between houses, or dorms, was more palpable then personality traits, but by actual biological differences. Cross Academy, the very first peaceful melding of vampires and humans. As one of the few vampire hunters left in existence, Wizengamot had appointed Zero temporary diplomat, scouting out the new school to see what it was all about. That was all well and good, especially since he would continue his magical studies afterwards, and may even have the chance to meet the vampire who had killed his family—and exact revenge.

He didn't expect for Kaien Cross to be so nice, nor his young daughter Yuuki.

And he most certainly _didn't _expect Kaname Kuran…

At the mere thought, Zero gripped the sides of the counter in agony, near knocking over the newt tails he'd been chopping up.

But it was better this way. Kuran would never remember the hateful, spiteful ex-human vampire hunter that had transferred that year, who stole his heart and, just as quickly, left once more.

.

.

.

"K—Kaname-sama?" Takuma breathed in shock.

Perhaps in surprise, the pureblood patted the spot beneath his eye numbly. It was wet. Was he… crying?

He looked around the room. There was nothing out of the ordinary.

"I—…" He blinked.

"Are you alright?" The noble was immediately in his face, attentive and concerned. "Do you need anything? Are you hurt?"

"I'm fine." He took a step back, stunned in disbelief.

"Should I call someone?" Takuma began hesitantly. "Do you need a doctor, or the headmaster, or—

"I'll be alright." Would he? He didn't even know. "If you could let yourself out, please."

Takuma's brows furrowed. "But Kaname-sama…"

"Please." He didn't want to call it a plead, but…

The noble bowed his head. "Of course."

He was crying.

Well, perhaps not the correct terminology. A tear had escaped his eyes. But why? What could have triggered such a reaction? The news that Zero Kiryu had left? Surely not. Perhaps something had stung them in the air. A pollen, of sorts.

Another glassy sphere of liquid dropped to the floor, creating a small, almost invisible stain.

They weren't stopping, he realized.

Perhaps he had some sort of allergy? He didn't know what else it could possibly be.

And if he had noticed that they came faster as he fingered a tie left behind on the chair that wasn't his, he didn't think of it any further.

.

.

.

"Zero?" Hermione looked up, startled, surprised to see her guest looking down, teacup shaking and lilac eyes glossy. "Oh, dear…" She hastily swiped a napkin from its delicate fold beside her plate, holding it out to him.

He took it, holding it to his eyes.

"What's wrong?" She asked worriedly. "Is it the tea? I'm sorry—I should've checked if it sat alright with vampires—

"It's not the tea." He croaked. "I'm just…

Just what?

Lovesick?

Incomplete?

Perhaps the luncheon had been a bad idea. It'd been a while since he'd seen the Gryffindor, though. The only girl in Hogwarts who could possibly be as studious as he was. Since he had come back, he'd swallowed himself hole in work, getting another job, not for the money, but just for something to busy himself with during the day. His never ending supply of dreamless sleep potions kept the burning vision of Kuran's eyes away at night, but that didn't' stop them from searing at his heart whenever he closed his eyes.

"I miss him."

Hermione grabbed his hand. He wanted to yank it away, hated the feeling of physical connectivity with anyone (but not Kuran?) but couldn't bring himself to. Not when it hurt so bad.

"Miss who?" Hermione asked, softly.

Kuran.

Though he knew there was no point. Kaname would be blissfully free of this splintering pain, like his heart was ripped clean in two and dripping down inside his chest, breaking in a slow death. Hopefully, he would completely forget all those words he'd whispered into his ear, the burning love that the two had shared.

"It's better this way." Zero said aloud, though he hadn't meant to. Hermione watched him curiously, sadly.

Her friend was falling apart in front of her.

And she wasn't the one he needed.

.

.

.

"_You need it."_

"_Need it?" He snarled viscously. "I don't need _anything _from you, you bast—_

"_No, I suppose you don't _need _it. Would it be any consolation if I wanted you to have it? Have my blood?"_

_Have me?_

Kaname's eyes fluttered open. The thick curtains kept out the sunlight, but they seemed to glow with the force of the sun behind them. He dabbed at his eyes. His lashes were wet, and his pillow was damp.

And he felt so incomplete.

.

.

.

It wasn't anything special.

Yuuki had taken it the day before winter holidays.

She was smiling with him on one side, Kaname on the other. She most likely hadn't any idea how important the shared image one mean to the ex-hunter and the pureblood when she'd taken it. It was the _only _picture they had together, though Kaname's smile was half there at best and Zero's wasn't there at all.

He hated to love to see it. To trace the lines of Kuran's tousled, dark hair and remember how it felt between his fingers. Hated that he _remembered _in general.

It was the only picture of them.

"_Incendio."_

And now it was distorted in flames.

.

.

.

Something was not right with him.

The pureblood had to feel bad, watching Yuuki struggle with the day class girls alone. She'd managed to erect some sort of rope line on the other side, the side that had once been silenced by the stormy presence of her fellow prefect. Now, however, the girls easily tackled it over, and Kuran was once more feeling the sting that accompanied the lack of Zero's presence. Had the vampire hunter been there, certainly Kaname wouldn't have to deal with such a magnitude of girls in his face.

"They'll need to get another one." Ruka was saying. "That poor Cross girl… she can't handle them all by herself."

"Doesn't matter to me." Cain shrugged. "As long as it isn't another vampire hunter."

"Maybe another girl." Aido added.

"A _cute _one." Hanabusa agreed.

Ruka kicked his shin.

There _had _to be something wrong with him.

For him to be missing Zero so badly.

.

.

.

Something had to be done.

Because he couldn't go on like this.

He'd ruined another perfectly good set of Zebra spleens in his haste, and had nothing but a mangled set of organs and a cut finger for results.

Every moment was plagued with stupid, stupid, beautiful Kuran, silence broken by sincere words he'd never hear again.

Zero mourned the loss of perfectly good potions ingredients.

He hadn't even begun his summer homework, either.

"Maybe you should take a vacation to Romania." Ron suggested with a wolfish grin. It seemed Zero's tryst last year with the elder Weasley had yet to be lived down.

"Maybe he just needs a break in general?" Supposed Harry aloud, as the four, including Hermione, though she'd disappeared into the bookstore, lounged in the courtyard of Diagon Alley, on one of Zero's breaks.

"I don't need a break from work." Zero denied. No, he just needed a break from life. "I like working."

"Obviously." Ron snorted. "You'd have to like it to work with potions. Can't stand them."

"Because you're not good at them." Interrupted Hermione, standing above their bench with an enormous stack of books. "Suppose none of you have bought your texts for this year?"

Ron paled.

Harry coughed weakly.

The two trashed their Florean Fortescue's ice cream, making a hasty retreat into the giant doors of Florish and Blotts. Hermione only tutted as she watched them go. "Honestly, so irresponsible… the lot of them!"

Zero smiled weakly. It felt like death. "They're just enjoying their summer."

"I guess." Hermione sniffed, before looking down the Alley. "I was hoping to get some shopping done. Would you do me the pleasure and accompany me?"

Zero shrugged. What else would he do? Sulk around the Alley until he eventually got tired of it and put himself into a dreamless sleep? "Sure." He answered amiably, allowing himself to be dragged around the Alley.

The witch gave a forlorn glance to Madam Primpernelle's Beautifying Potions, before fastidiously changing direction and hurtling them into a secondhand junk shop, full of broken wands, lopsided scales, and half torn books.

Hermione was placating herself with a giant Egyptian tome in the corner of the crowded room, and Zero was eying up a collection of rocks with holes through them, when he backed into a giant stone basin.

He caught it after a bit of a struggle with some of the objects stacked on it, holding what could have been a giant birdbath for a few moments before the owner snuck up on him.

"Caught your eye, huh?" He smiled. "Had that for a long time. I'm surprised no one bought it yet."

He eyed the statue warily. It hardly looked like anything important. Maybe he could put a fish in there, or something. "What is it?"

"What is it?" The man laughed. "It's a pensieve, my boy."

He bought it.

Not like he had anything better to spend all his money on.

Standing in the flat above the potion's store, his mind suddenly felt… lighter. Lighter then it had been in a long time. Kaname's dizzying eyes and the intensity of his touch had dulled into nothing but a lingering memory, all of them stored away in small glass vials.

He fingered them in silence, recalling what was in each of them. Every special moment, every heated kiss and every moment of love, captured like butterflies in his hand and caged into glass. After giving them each a longing, wrenching last look, he pushed the pensieve back into the corner. Grabbing the vials, he opened the top shelf of his cabinet and placed them in the back.

Zero smiled.

It was time.

In his hands, the dial tone ended.

"St. Mungo's, Mental Wing, I'm Charity—

"Hi." Zero cut her off. "Could you put me in contact with an obliviator?"

.

.

.

"An obliviate…"

"How strange… don't suppose it…"

A snort. "Obviously not a very good one…"

Kaname opened his eyes, wondering where he was that could possibly be this bright. His eyes met the burning ceiling lights, the white washed walls. The sterile smell that stung at his nose.

Ah.

The hospital.

But how?

"You're friend—Ichijou, I think?—brought you to the regional magical hospital. Do you remember anything?"

Kaname groaned aloud. It was so _bright_.

"Vampire." Whispered another voice. "Right. Forgot about that. Sorry, mate."

The light dimmed considerably.

The pureblood opened his eyes to two rather young looking men, boys really, dressed in long robes. They smiled at him, and he blinked at them, confused.

"You two are doctors?"

"Mediwizards." One, with the nametag Finnigan, corrected.

He'd never heard of anything like that.

"We're going to ask you a few questions." The other butted in, with the name of Thomas. "They might sound a bit strange. Do you know that you're a vampire?"

Kaname blinked.

Were they stupid?

"Of course."

"Do you know where you are?"

"… St. Januarius?" He hazarded. He was fairly sure that was the closest hospital to Cross Academy.

Finnigan nodded. "Yup. In the magical wing."

He eyed the two of them. "The… magical wing?" Were they perhaps, kidding? Magic? What?

"You _are _classified as a Magical Creature, you know. Vampire, and all. Therefore, you're entitled to free magical health care. The bill just passed Wizengamot, didn't you know?"

Kaname eyed the two of them warily, wondering how to go forward. He could call them mad, find Ichijou and demand to know why he'd charged him to this… this bizarre hospital, because for the love of god he couldn't remember _anything_, but instead, he breathed deeply.

"No, I didn't know." He decided upon, patiently. "Could you perhaps explain it to me?"

.

.

.

"And incidentally," Hermione began as she pushed open the door to Zero's apartment. "Have you been taking a pepper up potion, or something? You're quite…"

She took in his appearance. The healthy glow to his skin that seemed to have left him, the brightness to his eyes and the sunny smile on his face.

"Content." She finished, stunned.

"No, I don't think so." The vampire chuckled. "Maybe I was just under the weather?"

"That could be it." Hermione supposed. "Maybe it had something to do with your trip."

"Maybe." Zero agreed. "To be honest, I can't remember much of it. It all seems like a bit of a blur to me."

"A blur?" Hermione watched him cautiously, seating herself in his sitting room. "I don't suppose you… remember anyone, do you?"

Zero paused in making tea. "Hmm…" He drawled aloud, closing an open textbook on his counter. "No, not anyone in particular."

"Not even a boy, or something?" She asked aloud, remembering his heartbreaking face, the lilted whisper…

_(I miss him)_

"Nothing." Zero insisted, with a clear smile.

Hermione supposed that it was for the best, then. Perhaps he'd simply gotten over whoever he met then.

The boy sat down text to her, handing her the tea and diving headlong into a deep theory on house elf history. Hermione couldn't complain, immediately immersing as well in a topic she found most fascinated.

Perhaps it hadn't been very serious at all, then.

.

.

.

"I've never met a wizard in my life." Kaname retorted. Aside from the two of them ,at any rate.

"Well you've had to have met a wizard at some point." The boy blinked, puzzled. "That was quite a memory charm on you."

"Memory charm?" Kaname sat up straighter. "I had a memory charm?"

"A bloody big one." Said the boy, Finnigan. "We're training to be magical creature Mediwizards. It's why we're at this hospital—

"Interning." Cut in Thomas cheekily.

"But I've never seen such a giant wipe like that! Must've been a few months, don't you think?" He turned to his dark skinned partner, who nodded.

"Maybe even a year." Agreed Thomas.

"At any rate." Finnigan began anew. "We had to remove the block entirely. It was keeping so many memories, it was threatening to completely throw off your psyche. Are you feeling any better now?"

Kaname tried to remember.

Takuma, pleading with him to at least see a doctor. Himself, insisting he was fine. But even he couldn't explain the deep sadness, which lingered like a biter afterthought on his tongue, a sorrow that made his heart slow and his fingers tremble, mouth attempting to make words that he couldn't quite remember. It was hell, knowing something resided beneath the surface, but too deep to grasp.

Something important, something he missed dearly.

Something he _loved _dearly.

"Zero." He realized, with a brief, sharp intake of breath.

Zero, kissing his forehead, giving him a broken smile. Wand pointed at his head.

"_Obliviate." _

He had said.

"Obliviate." Kaname repeated aloud. "Is that the charm?"

"Yeah." Finnigan nodded, looking a little confused. "It erases memories. Though, whoever did yours obviously never casted it before. But did you just say…

"Zero?" Thomas finished for him. They seemed to be in the habit of finishing each other's sentences quite a lot. "Zero Kiryu?"

He nearly bolted to his feet at the recognition in their eyes. "You know him?"

"Know him?" Finnigan snorted. "Who doesn't? He goes to our school—err, did. Transferred in some exchange program last year—

"That's right." Dean Thomas interrupted, for the _umpteenth_ time. If Kaname wasn't so interested in their conversation, he'd have taken the time to point out how they always seemed to do that. "Transferred somewhere around…"

"Here." The finished together, in startled unison.

"Cross Academy." Kaname agreed. "Do you know why?"

"An exchange program." Dean clarified once more, seating himself in one of the many plush chairs. "He's a vampire. I remember it was a big deal when he came to Hogwarts because of that…"

He and Finnigan shared a look. "Isn't Cross Academy a vampire and muggle school?"

He didn't know what muggle meant, but he nodded anyway. "It's part of a peace movement. To realize that humans and vampires can live together."

"Did you know him?" Finnigan pressed on. "At your school?"

Know him?

Perhaps more intimately then these two would ever know…

"Something like that." He dismissed, though it ached to say it like that. "An exchange program, you said? Where is he now?

"Well, Wizarding Britain, I suppose." Dean mused thoughtfully. "Our term at Hogwarts starts in a couple weeks. He was only supposed to be at Cross Academy for a year, if I remember correctly."

Only a year?

Kaname swallowed thickly.

And all this time… Zero had known? That he'd be leaving? That there was this enormous, insurmountable _magical world _that resided between the two of them? A barrier that could never be crossed?

Maybe that was why he'd obliviated him.

To give him the ability to forget.

Kaname closed his eyes.

But he didn't _want _to forget.

.

.

.

But Zero did.

"Do you miss him?" Luna asked.

She was standing at the bay windows, feeding his owl with scraps of breakfast. She'd invited herself over, as usual. Zero had stopped being surprised at her abrupt comings and goings. Luna, like her hair that was currently floating, went in all different directions. There was no real way to pinpoint her, without encompassing all of her. And that was a feat much easier said then done.

"Miss who?" He replied, more interested in the text he was reading. Astronomy was so very fascinating…

"Kuran." She said, was if talking of the weather, flicking through his mail. "Kaname Kuran."

"I don't think I know who that is." Zero blinked curiously. "Should I?"

"Maybe you should answer that question." She turned to him, owlish eyes peering at him slowly. "Should you?"

"Well I…" Zero closed the book in his lap. "I suppose I really don't know. I guess I shouldn't, if I don't, right?"

"If you don't, maybe you should?" Luna countered.

"You shouldn't argue for the sake of arguing." Zero scowled lazily.

"But arguing for the sake of arguing is what makes arguing so arguable, don't you agree?"

"Is it okay not to have an opinion?"

"No."

The vampire felt a headache coming on. Frown deepening, he moved to the potion cabinet.

"You're mind is curiously blank." Surmised Luna, as he popped the cork and dipped the entire vial into his mouth.

He wiped the liquid off his mouth, grimacing. "Is that an insult?"

"It's not an insult." She sat down on his couch. "It's a fact."

Zero clutched at his head with features contorting in pain. The headache potion hadn't helped at all. He could still feel the clambering in his head, a dull throbbing pain encasing the bottom of his skull like a lover's caress, dubiously ironic in a way he couldn't quite remember. It hurt, but for some reason, his heart hurt infinitely more.

"The potions won't work." Luna began cheerfully. "Those headaches are the side effects of an obliviate."

Zero blinked in surprise.

"An obliviate?" He repeated, forlorn. "But when did I get obliviated?"

"Shouldn't you know?" The blonde Ravenclaw giggled. "You were the one who wanted it, after all."

.

.

.

"School's starting _way _to early." Ron groaned.

"It starts the same day every year." Harry chided with a smile.

Zero rolled his eyes. "Ron's just mad that the school year's starting and the Canons still haven't won a game yet—

"I don't want to have to sit in the common room and hear Finnigan cheer for the Harpies. It'd be one thing if he was just some sort of silent listener—_totally _different when he trashes the Cannons every other sentence."

"Well you've got to admit they haven't been doing so well lately." Zero pointed out.

"As in the last century." Harry added.

Ron huffed, turning a bit red. "Not you guys too! It's all part of the plan. It's a come back, I tell you. Just you wait…"

"Oh, twig cleaners!" Harry stopped abruptly, a stack of boxes in the window of the Quidditch store obviously catching the Seeker's eye. "Mind if we stop in for a bit? I've been dying for some new ones."

"You and that Firebolt." Zero grinned. "Yeah, sure, I'll just wait out here."

Harry was already near sprinting into the shop, Ron following at a slower pace. "You should join this year." Said the redhead over his shoulder. "Ravenclaw could use a new Chaser! Everyone knows Brotts is awful."

The silver haired boy only rolled his eyes. As if he'd try out for something so mundane as Quidditch.

"Zero!"

The seventh year Ravenclaw turned at the sound of his name, though he didn't recognize the voice.

He was unprepared when he was wrapped in familiar, strong arms.

The vampire blinked, startled, ready to push the other man away.

He looked familiar, in a vague way. Maybe the shape of his eyes, their intense, deep coloring. The smooth line of his nose and the cut of his jaw. The neck, perhaps, was what called to him the most.

"Zero." The man said again, softer this time. It was definitely the eyes. Like Zero had stared up at them everyday for months, every hour, every minute…

The boy blinked up at him. "Do I know you?"

.

.

.

"I'm sorry…" Hermione picked at the flowers, feeling empathetic tears welling up in her eyes. "You… you came all this way, didn't you?"

The vampire looked away, an impassive and controlled look to his face. Hermione wondered what went on beneath that mask.

"Japan is very, very far away." She began, hesitantly. "Were you surprised? Did you know anything of the wizarding world up until now?"

"Nothing." Said the pureblood vampire, honestly. "I'd never heard of wizards. Goblins… werewolves…"

"It's a bit overwhelming." Hermione smiled wryly.

The vampire, Kuran, shrugged. "There are worse."

One of them was sleeping in ignorance down the hall.

"He remembered, at first." She confessed, wondering if she should. Her answer lay in the heartbrokenly earnest need that flickered in the vampire's eyes at her words. "It was killing him… I could tell. Every moment, I'm pretty sure, he was reliving his moments with you."

She sighed.

"Perhaps he regretted his choices. I'm afraid I couldn't tell you. But I know Zero—he wouldn't have done this, had he thought he had any other choice."

"I thought I knew him too." Kuran muttered, maybe a little bitterly. Zero beneath him, hands laced with his. Fangs in his neck, the beating of their hearts as one. Maybe he didn't know him at all. This magical Zero, who obviously had no qualms with keeping most of his secrets from the man he was supposed to have loved unconditionally.

"I'm truly sorry." Said Hermione sincerely. "It seems your trip may have been a waste."

.

.

.

Or maybe it hadn't.

The Gryffindor traced the edges of the basin with a thoughtful look. She had her uniform on—the train would be leaving that afternoon, and as a prefect, she'd be having to attend meetings on the Hogwarts Express instead of lounging about and changing with the others—standing in the dusty, muted sunshine of Zero's loft.

She'd only noticed it earlier that morning, it blended so nicely with his décor.

The pensieve was half hidden by what looked to be an expensive French chair, pushed against the window where flowers were covering most of the basin from view.

A pensieve, and a boxful of memories.

Maybe Zero hadn't truly forgotten at all.

She smiled, returning to her parchment.

_Dear Mister Kuran;_

_ I think perhaps I've been wrong…_

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.

.


End file.
